How can I stop shutting down and start to be happy?

Shutdownness - state of being shut down

When life gets overwhelming and seems to not be letting up, sometimes we start to emotionally and physically shut down. The world just becomes too much; we get exhausted, sore, irritable, all we want to do is go somewhere quiet and be alone. We shut down. You now possess shutdownness.

When you are entrenched in victimhood, feeling the pain of suffering, the ups and down of life; where you can’t help but take things personally, when it feels as if life is happening to you instead of unfolding through you and for you. You end up shutting down emotionally and energetically. Shutdownness is when you are having feelings of anger, judgement, resentment, trying to control reality, where the only pleasure you know is through the avoidance of pain. We are always trying to distance ourselves from the feeling of pain and loss or how can we distance ourselves from the things we know are going to hurt us.

To unravel that or to heal from that, consider this… Many people who are afraid of being alone or feeling so low that there doesn’t seem to be a way out, oftentimes experience some of the lowest vibrations such as anger, sadness, depression, denial, worthlessness. When you realize that no matter how shut down you are, your ego believes that you are shielding yourself from the future potential loss, grief, abandonment, pain, suffering.

To get out of that, is to realize that you may have shut down as a way of trying protect yourself from further pain and suffering or future pain and suffering. However, can you begin to see that no amount of shutdownnness can actually stop your life from unfolding the way it is meant to unfold. No matter how much you shut down, no matter how much you resist, no matter how much you turn away, deny, fight, argue, negotiate with the universe – no amount of that actually makes a difference in what is going to happen in your life. If anything is meant to unfold, if anything is meant to come, if anything is meant to go; you cannot prevent that from happening by shutting down. Because you cannot prevent the “bad stuff” from happening, then that also means that you cannot get in the way of the “good stuff” happening.

No amount of shutdownness can prevent any potential adversity and no amount of shutdownness can prevent the universe from bringing you exactly what you are destined to receive at the exact moment you are meant to receive it. Shutdownness cannot stop the potential pain and also cannot interrupt the goodness of your destiny. So what is the point of being shut down. If shutting down doesn’t prevent pain and cannot interrupt pleasure, then why not just be happy?

You may lose, you may have to start all over again, it might be painful, inconvenient, it might be frustrating and confusing, but there is no benefit to shutting down throughout any of this. The reason you are happy is not because things are going your way, not because you have money in the bank, not because you are popular in your profession, not because of how anything is arranged in your life; you are only happy because there is no point in shutting down.

There is no benefit to shutting down. Shutting down is not protecting anything; not preventing anything and certainly not getting in the way of the all things that you desire.

Shutting down is negative vibration – negative energy. The reason people believe that negative energy can interrupt the manifestation of positive things, is because of the inherent belief that positive and negative energies have the same capacity of power. Positive energy is way more powerful than negative energy.

Positive energy is so powerful that from the heart that it radiates from, it has the power to transform the giver and the receiver and even the witnesses of giving and receiving at the same time! Negativity only has the power to primarily toxify the energy field of the giver of negativity.

There is no value to shutting down. Shutting down does not protect you from pain and does not interrupt the goodness and blessings that you are always meant to find. Happiness is caused by not being in a relationship with shutting down. Shutting down robs you of the opportunity to positively affect the energy field.

Can the law of attraction be used to get your ex back?

The way that I understand it; love is knowing and appreciation. Love is the incorporation of knowing and appreciation. Knowing in genuineness - knowing yourself, knowing another person - and a genuine appreciation of yourself and another person. This combination of expressions is love. You generate the feeling of affection in association with the expression of love, of knowing and appreciating.

As you familiarize yourself with self, you generate a knowing of yourself, and that familiarity and that knowing of yourself generates acceptance. In acceptance, you generate appreciation. But you may not offer yourself a genuine acceptance if you do not include the familiarity and the knowing.

When you recognize this familiarity and this knowing of yourself, and generate acceptance and appreciation, you automatically allow yourself the natural by-product which is to express this outwardly to other people. The more clarity you allow yourself of yourself, the more genuine clarity you offer to other people.

Regarding the steps to get your ex back?? Try the following steps.

• Step 1 – Know yourself. Know yourself deeply. Understand who you really are, what your preferences are, your likes and dislikes.
• Step 2 – Appreciate yourself. When you appreciate yourself you appreciate your accomplishments. Start by noting on a notebook everything that you accomplish daily. No matter how mundane the accomplishment is, just note it.
• Step 3 – Trust that the Universe will deliver a suitable partner. life wants your full and absolute trust so that you can receive the fulfillment that you want for yourself. What you want and what life wants for you is the same, but life has a very different way of giving it to you than how you want it.
• Step 4 - Believe that it is possible to attract a lover of your dreams. Your belief systems can be responsible for the reality that you are experiencing now. Your decisions, emotions and thoughts are all related to your beliefs.

I’ve written a book - Believing is Seeing - on belief systems and how they impact your life.

Once the 4 steps above (knowing, appreciating, trusting, believing) are incorporated, then you will begin to see the result. You will start to see a lot of changes in you as you start to know, appreciate, trust and believe in yourself.

You might not get your ex back. You might attract a better lover for you.

Life wants to give you what you want to receive. Life wants to give it to you in a far different way than how you imagine receiving it. Life’s way is always going to be a higher possibility that how you want things to occur. It’s not like you are putting aside what you want if you are allowing life to give you what you want on its terms.

Whether or not that means you get what you want at the moment you want it. Or maybe you only receive it later. Because that’s in your highest interest. Accept that you have everything you want and more. It may just not involve the way that you envision or demand it to.

This FREE eBook - Believing is Seeing - will show you how your beliefs determine your reality. Not only will it explain how you can attract a romantic relationship, but also how you can attract wealth, health and overall success.

Is there a scientific (or otherwise) truth in the theory that thoughts can create reality?

Scientists have come to the same conclusions, proving that you create your own reality. And also that your reality is the product of your desire, imagination, and expectancy. This FREE Webinar - DIE for SUCCESS - explains how your desire, imagination and expectancy influences your reality. You know that your physical reality is made of matter, the solid stuff that we are used to. The stuff that we can touch, see and feel. The floors on which you stand, the chair on which you sit, etc.

The solid stuff is not really solid, but it is made up of molecules. These are sometimes called molecular structures. There is actually more space in the solid stuff than the ‘solid’ stuff. These molecular structures are actually made of atoms that have nuclei, electrons, protons and various components that make up the atomic particles.

However, the atom is not the smallest thing, nor are the atomic particles the smallest things there is. They are not the smallest building blocks of the universe. There is something smaller that scientists call sub-atomic particles in the name of neutrinos and quacks and various other little names that they have for them. They are the smallest particles that your reality is constructed.

Scientists have found that they cannot find these sub-atomic particles because they are very, very small. But what they can do is track them; see where they have been, as they send atoms through accelerators and other sophisticated machines with names that I cannot pronounce.

What they have found is that the intent of the scientist; the thought of the person making the test, has impact upon the patterns; upon the vibrational frequencies of the sub-atomic particles. They have found that if the scientist thinks it should look this way, it will. If another scientist says it should look that way, it will. They found that the core of the sub-atomic particles; i.e. the energy units and vibrational strings of energies that are even smaller, are also subject to thought.

What you desire, what you expect and what you imagine is going to happen, is what happens at that base or core level of your physical reality. I explain how desire, imagination and expectancy work in this FREE webinar - DIE for SUCCESS.

Now, those building blocks of your reality are subject to thought and respond to your desire, your imagination and your expectancies.

It is those mini particles that make up our universe and that determines what atom is what atom and what phenomena and what characteristics it will have. These particles produce the atoms which produce matter. Clearly, it is such that matter is the product of your desire, your desire, your imagination, and your expectancy.

Scientists have double-blind experiments because they have found that there is no such thing as an observer. There are only participants in reality. A particular scientist with a particular theory will have an impact on the outcome of the experiment that he is conducting.

If they expect that the rats will do something, they will. So they create double-blind experiments so as to cut out the phenomena of expectation and its impact upon reality.

A Daily Practice for SUCCESS

Embarking on a journey of transformation requires true commitment. However, you should not confuse commitment with effort. We normally determine effort by how hard we push, whereas commitment can be determined by how often we are present. Effort is indeed required in many aspect of life, it is important to remember that pushing harder does not determine the outcomes we seek. These are usually accessed by our greater commitment to the cause.

Such a commitment is not only about how good we are at a particular practice, but of perfecting the art of consistent implementation. When based on true commitment, transformation practice can offer many benefits to accelerate the development of our journey. It can expand the parameters of limiting perspectives and possibly offer explanation to the unfolding mysteries within us.

You do this daily practice to make time daily for your own self-care and personal growth. You will allow the value of your highest ethics to expand. If such practice is not established as a necessary part of your day, you are more likely to be shaken by the uncertain ground of the change you cannot avoid. The more daily practice is established as part of your routine, the greater harmoniousness you tend to feel, no matter how surprising life becomes.

A daily practice is not a matter of being good at something, it is simply an exploration unto the effort of attendance. It strengthens the skill of consistency.

This daily practice should be used as an opportunity to make your own evolution in self-care a vital part of your daily experience. Whether you have a good day of practice or feel as if you are fighting every step of the way, it is always a useful means to support greater emotional and energetic harmony as you face boredom, loneliness, frustration and confusion. It signifies the signpost of your deepest inner transformation.

Although all the exercises and meditations in the 30-Day Transformation Program can be used as daily transformation practice, a daily practice mentioned in this blog is a good start.

The Practice

1. Write down 3 things you are grateful for. If nothing arises, write down 3 things you wish you felt grateful for.
2. Write down 3 things you have done right today. If nothing arises, write down 3 things you wish you could acknowledge yourself for doing right.
3. Write down 3 things you would love to manifest into your reality. If nothing arises, write down 3 things you would love to manifest for somebody.

This daily practice has been developed to support your most miraculous transformation.

Why do we need free will when there’s destiny?

When you were co-created (by the Universe and yourself), before you were even born, your destiny was determined. You came here on earth with your destiny already set. That cannot change. You cannot miss out on experiences you are destined to have. Because your destiny is so destined, your choices can never take you out of alignment with what already is meant to be.

You don’t have to visualize what you want, it has already been given to you. And it will show up in a chapter of your life where it can be received without becoming a distraction. Where it can be received with joy without creating any sense of fear. Sometimes when we get what we want, having what we want becomes the next threat or afraid to lose. Then you spend some time afraid to lose it that you don’t enjoy it.

Destiny is a guarantee, but it is a guarantee that occurs with your participation. The most important part of destiny is that it is your participation that decides the quality of your experience. This is your free will. So it is very possible for you to experience a destiny that is guaranteed to unfold in a particular way, but it may not unfold with you having the exact experience you want to have of it. What is not set in stone is the quality of experience you will have of it. The outcome will come to be but you decide (through your free will) how or what the quality of experience shall be.

The way to determine the quality of experience is to participate in some form of action on your part. Do whatever is necessary to ensure that the quality of experience is a good one. However, try not to work on an exhausting and fear-based fashion that you are not actually allowing a grace of faith to carry you through every moment. This is your free will. Your free will is deciding what kind of experience are you going to have in your path to your predetermined destiny.

How can I re-align myself when feeling down?

7 R’s of Re-alignment

This is a tool you use when you need to be tossed a lifesaver. When you, in your reality, sense that you are going down.

1. Relax

• Switch your phone off and make sure you will not be disturbed for the next 5 minutes
• Sit or lie down in a comfortable position, in a quiet place. It can be on the beach, in your office, bedroom or anywhere you feel comfortable.
• You may sit on the floor on a chair or couch. You do not have to sit in a lotus position.
• Close your eyes
• Blank your mind and focus on the blackness behind your eyes

2. Release

• Take 3 deep breaths all the way down to the bottom of your being.
• Inhale through your nose, exhale through your mouth
• Feel your tension melting away.
• Feel your anger and fear melting away while still focusing on the blackness of behind your eyes.

3. Reflect

• What must you believe in that given situation in order to be creating a reality you do not prefer?
• Reflect upon your definitions. Define what you are believing and be willing to re-assign the preferred beliefs and act that way.

4. Remember

• Remember what your vision is.
• Remember what it is that excites you.
• Re-center yourself to what excites you.
• Remember yourself, do not dismember yourself.

5. Respond

• Allow yourself to move with conviction.
• Allow yourself to light a fire beneath your feet and get shaking.
• Move.

6. Realize

• Realize your preferred reality.

7. Rejoice

• Rejoice, for you have re-connected with the center of your beingness.
• You have re-aligned yourself according to preference.

If you truly believe in what excites you; you will not accept any evidence that what excites you does not work. And if you do believe that what truly excites you does not work, look at that belief. You cannot change it until you own it. If that is your truest belief, look to transform it, otherwise it will always limit you in that way.

Your perception makes or breaks you